tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8103677603180455832024-02-07T11:58:08.015+00:00The Flackenhack Awards 2009The alternative awards for the UK's technology PR and media community...The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.comBlogger52125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-73077995706308604552009-06-30T18:15:00.006+01:002009-06-30T18:38:35.212+01:00Woke up this morning, got myself a gun. . .First day back from hibernation, and already we've got two Flackenhacks 2009 award entries in the bag.<br /><br />The first <a href="http://www.observer.com/2009/media/jeff-jarvis-give-government-permission-fail">comes from </a>Jeff Jarvis at the Personal Democracy Forum in (where else?) New York City.<br /><br />"We must give the government permission to fail," says Jarvis.<br /><br />Oh right. I thought we'd been doing that for years. As in (say) New Labour's inability to deliver its promises on child poverty.<br /><br />The second. . . (and I don't know what category this qualifies for) is inevitably Pirate Bay.<br /><br />Having fought the law like pirates for however many years, Messrs Piratical have now <a href="http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/06/30/pirate_bay_gaming_factory_x_ab/">sold out </a>to The Man. This morning. For around $7.7m.<br /><br />Way to go. No interim mention of putting the site up for sale, no preparatory indications that the financial stress was taking a toll. No: just sell it.<br /><br />Dewy-eyed peer-to-peer idealists around the world are currently <a href="http://search.twitter.com/search?q=pirate+bay+sell+out">wreaking their revenge</a>. This includes a DDoS attack on the site itself. Nice.<br /><br />By how much will Global Gaming Factory X AB reduce its bid for The Pirate Bay to compensate for collateral brand damage by the time the deal closes a month hence?<br /><br />Your guess is as good as ours. Meanwhile, the notion that direct contact between organisations and their users/customers can replace the dark art of spin. . . well, it just took a blow.<br /><br />What the Pirates needed above all, it turns out, was a decent PR agency. Global Gaming Factory could do with one, too. . .The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-2002754265740248392008-10-30T16:17:00.003+00:002008-10-30T16:25:38.911+00:00Lost at The Flackenhacks: One mobile (Nokia/Bite)<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Lost at The Flackenhacks (or possibly in a cab afterwards)...</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">One </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> Nokia handset: "Black, very new and the screensaver is of the top of the Alps. Some of the names you’ll find in it are Bethan Onions or Greg Callus."</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-size: 13px;">Owner = Tony Lederer of Bite. It would be grand if we could reunite him with his handset...</span></div><div> </div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-30359281041731815922008-10-30T15:29:00.006+00:002008-10-30T15:55:28.809+00:00Oh yeah, the winners. . .<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><b><span style="Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">1) PR Agency of the Year</span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Rainier PR</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><b><span style="Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">2) Tech hack of the year (freelance)</span></span></b><span style="Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Jessica Twentyman</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'Times New Roman';"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><b><span style="Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">3) Tech hack of the year (staff)</span></span></b><span style="Times New Roman"; font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Charles Arthur & Michael Cross -- The Guardian<br />(For their excellent </span><a href="http://www.freeourdata.org.uk/"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Free Our Data</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> campaign.)</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><b><span style="Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">4) Biggest fuck up</span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Microsoft: The $300m Gates-Seinfeld campaign</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;mso-bidi-Times New Roman"; font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">5) Rudest hack (Voted for on the night)</span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Gary Flood</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;mso-bidi-Times New Roman"; font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">6) Media budget cutter</span></span></b><span style=" font-family:Georgia;mso-bidi-Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">The shortlist included Sly Bailey (Trinity Mirror), Graham Harman (Incisive Media), Geoff Wilmot (Centaur), Jerry Yang (Yahoo). And the winner was. . . all of 'em.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;mso-bidi-Times New Roman"; font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">7) Up its own arse</span></span></b><span style=" font-family:Georgia;mso-bidi-Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Google's Zeitgeist conference (feat. Rania Al Abdullah, Queen of Jordan)</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;mso-bidi-Times New Roman"; font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">9) Wank 2.0: User-generated twat</span></span></b><span style="font-family:Georgia;mso-bidi-Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Richard Bailey, </span><a href="http://prstudies.typepad.com/weblog/2008/10/ordure-ordure.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">PR Studies</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> ("Created Aug 03")</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Calibri;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="Times New Roman"; font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">10) Loyalty to dead media formats</span></span></b><span style="Times New Roman";font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">The Financial Times</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'Times New Roman';"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="Times New Roman"; font-family:";color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">11) Rebrand of the year (Not)</span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0); "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Enfatico (Probably not a pizza restaurant in East Sheen</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">)</span></span></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-35197180214408729612008-10-30T15:09:00.003+00:002008-10-30T15:29:28.765+00:00Puzzled hack will say sorry: if necessary'Twas put to the popular vote on the night. Borrowing from the finest traditions of Zimbabwean democracy, MC Paul Wooding asked for a vote from the floor.<div><br /></div><div>Who was the rudest hack? Charles Arthur, Gary Flood or Giles Coren?<div><br /></div><div>It was Gary. By a nose, we think.</div><div><br /></div><div>Now here's the thing. At 22.06 last night, Mr Flood rapped out an email to his mailing list as follows. (He must have started writing a few minutes after the award was announced).</div><div><br /></div><div><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'"></span></span></p><blockquote><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'">Er, apparently I beat Charles Arthur to win 'rudest technology journalist of the year' at the above tonight.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'">I am a bit confused. I was last a bit 'rude' - aguably, I thought I was doing my job and defending the interests of the readers/users - let's see, when I was the News Editor of Computing - that was in 1999-2000.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'">I have been freelance since the start of 2001, seven years, and to the best of my knowledge have been nice as pie ever since.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'">If I'm not then, Jeez, I'm in a bit of trouble on the old self-awareness thing.\</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'">Can anyone - genuine plea - tell me/give me an example of IN 2008 how I have been 'rude,' I'd like to know and if necessary apologise.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'">But then, as Charles Arthur said on Twitter, pointing out why he wasn't at the 'ceremony,' it's half term and he has better things to think about...</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'">'Puzzled Hack'</span></span></p></blockquote><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Courier New;font-size:85%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Courier New'"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p></div><div>Here at The Flackenhacks, we're mindful of the need to promote peace, love and understanding on our fragile planet.<br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Boys and girls, you know where to <a href="http://www.garyflood.com/">send</a> those emails. . .</div></div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-46556777416662904632008-10-30T15:02:00.002+00:002008-10-30T15:08:04.787+00:00Award time: The two Steves (of Rainier) & Dan Ilett<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: -webkit-monospace; font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap; "><a href="http://twitpic.com/iw9x" title="@wadds congrats again. Good to see Mr Earl adopting proper st... on TwitPic"><img src="http://twitpic.com/show/thumb/iw9x.jpg" width="150" height="150" alt="@wadds congrats again. Good to see Mr Earl adopting proper st... on TwitPic" /></a></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: -webkit-monospace; font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: -webkit-monospace; font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Rainier won agency of the year at The Flackenhacks last night. Here's Steve Earl adopting the position alongside Wadds and award presenter (and fabricator) Dan Ilett.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: -webkit-monospace; font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: -webkit-monospace; font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-18485651279509459932008-10-30T04:09:00.002+00:002008-10-30T04:38:21.216+00:00Knackered, but.... . . you'll find some pictures <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/30010271@N04/">here</a> on Flickr. (Taken with our special camera that records the date as 15th October, accentuates yellow teeth and makes Mike Butcher look like Shakin' Stevens. Please, feel free to borrow it. Soon.)<div><br /></div><div>Ice creams? Allegedly, you lot ate 120 odd cones. That's what Onur, the nice bloke in the ice cream van, told us. Can't quite believe it, but he had no incentive to lie and used to run a nightclub in Thamesmead. So there you go...</div><div><br /></div><div>Booze? Mmm. Was it impending recession, or did y'all drink less this year? Last year, believe it or not, you consumed 1.5 bottles of wine each. By the looks of it, less this year.</div><div><br /></div><div>Sound: there's an inquisition in motion. But we reckon apologies are in order to you the audience (and compere Paul Wooding) for the PA during the first onstage bit.</div><div><br /></div><div>We think it got better during the awards. But by how much? It was hard to say from our perch on the far left of the venue. Let us know how it was. We'll carry your verdict back to our suppliers...</div><div><br /></div><div>Oh, and the pies. Where were they? Answer: because of cost pressures, we had to nix them in favour of paella. Good choice? Bad choice? Tell us.</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway...........we hope you enjoyed it. As for us, well, The Flackenhacks is signing off after a 22-hour day. AKA seriously bushed.</div><div><br /></div><div>Tomorrow, we'll put up a post thanking those who need to be thanked (and there are quite a few of you). For now, though, cheerio peeps. And thanks for coming.</div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-68816360898032726242008-10-29T11:21:00.002+00:002008-10-29T11:34:42.255+00:00Last minute things (including a 3-ton ice cream van)Righty-ho. We're just getting ready to head off to the venue, where a 3-ton ice cream truck will be arriving at 3pm. Yeah, we're hoping it'll make it down the ramps on to the floor... Fingers crossed...<div><br /></div><div>What's been happening?</div><div><ul><li>Steve Earl from Rainier PR has just booked a ticket. He's asking that we keep all the horrid PR people away from this year's event. Sorry, mate, it's a bit late for that. 250 of them have their compasses fixed on Shoreditch tonight...<br /><br /></li><li>eBay bidding</li></ul><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Martin Veitch: £200<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Phil Muncaster: £86.00</div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Gordon Kelly: £86.00 (ongoing)<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Eric Doyle: £50.00<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- David Meyer: £36.00<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Mark Dye: £36.00<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Bryan Glick: £30.99<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Mark Samuels: £26.00<br /><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Rob Kerr: £26.00<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Jeremy Kirk: £26.00<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Mike Dempsey: £19.99<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Rupert Goodwins: £19.99<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Andy McCue: £19.99<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- Tim Phillips: £19.99 (ongoing)<br /></div><div><br /></div><div><ul><li>Dress code</li></ul><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- We keep getting people asking us this. There isn't a dress code. Come as you are. . .</div><div><br /></div><div><ul><li>Ticket sales</li></ul><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- They stop at 1pm today. No ticket sales on the door (really -- it will just hold everything <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>up...). If your name ain't on the guest list by 1pm, Brendan Cooper of Fleishman-Hillard will <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>deny you entry.</div><div><ul><li>Er, that's about it. See you lot at 7.30. We're off to buy in some more wine. Just in case. . .</li></ul></div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-60827129683297933442008-10-28T17:32:00.006+00:002008-10-28T17:41:39.898+00:00The Shortlist: Part 3<p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="color:red;">9) Loyalty to dead media formats</span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo1; tab-stops:list 18.0pt 36.0pt"><span style="font-family: Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>The bosses at Independent News & Media<br />-- Editor turned MD Simon Kelner thinks the web is like a horrible noisy bar. Really</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l0 level1 lfo2; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">The Financial Times<br />-- Crap online, brilliant in print. Memo to Mr Barber: Resign and hand the show over to those Alphaville boys. Before it's too late.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l0 level1 lfo2; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Incisive Media<br />-- When he shut down IT Week, MG Graham Harman told Press Gazette: “You have to say to yourself ‘If I was launching into this market now what would I do? What do [readers] want now and how do I service them?’”<br />Fine advice. So why the hell is Incisive still publishing Computing as a weekly newspaper? Answers on a postcard, please.<br /> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="color:red;">10) Rebrand of the year</span></b><span style="color:red;"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="color:black;">Company in trouble? Call it something else…nobody will ever guess. Product not selling? Give it a new name…that'll boost sales. Do they think we're stupid? No, they don't think it. The research said so.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Enfatico<span class="apple-style-span"><br />-- Jesus. What's this? A pizza 'n' pasta chain? No, sorry. . . it's the appalingly weak name given to WPP's standalone agency dedicated to Dell. Apparently, Enfatico signifies: "<span class="apple-style-span">a hyper-responsive, truly integrated marketing agency designed from the ground up to create value for our clients". Or should that be <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">client</span>?</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><st1:stockticker st="on"><span style="color:black;">CNET</span></st1:stockticker><span style="color:black;"> Networks becomes. . . CBS Interactive<br />-- Take one hallowed digital brand and flog it to a TV company whose <st1:stockticker st="on">DNA</st1:stockticker> owes more to Mad Men than dot.com. Granted, we quite like CBS's logo. It has stayed the same for so long that it's become hip again. Back to square one? You betcha.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><st1:stockticker st="on"><span style="color:black;">CSC<br />-- The "leading global consulting, systems integration and outsourcing company" isn't quite the world's leading anything. But the guff it used to explain its rebranding this year was very dire. El Reg's gag about <a href="http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/06/06/csc_rebrand/">cutting corners</a> is priceless.<br /><br /></span></st1:stockticker></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b><span style=" ;font-family:'Times New Roman';color:red;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">11) Bandwagon jump of the year</span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">McAfee warns of terrorists in virtual worlds<br />-- But if they’re virtual, <a href="http://sturgeonslaw.blogspot.com/2008/08/let-facts-good-story-dont-in-way-of.html">can they terrorize us</a>? Er, no. don’t think so.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">HP, Sun & Teradata: Wind power madness<br />-- Why have hardware manufacturers started using pictures of wind farms on their websites? Like, everywhere. . .</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><st1:stockticker st="on"><span style="color:black;">IBM</span></st1:stockticker><span style="color:black;">: Project Big Green<br /><span style="color:black;">-- Big Blue promises to spend $1bn on </span>a bid to "dramatically increase the efficiency" of the company's software and hardware. But <st1:stockticker st="on"><span style="color:black;">IBM</span></st1:stockticker><span style="color:black;"> has told no-one how it intends to spend this money. . . And oddly, the company stopped issuing Big Green press releases around the time (late August) that the price of oil started to plummet. Funny that.</span></span></p>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-87434514441825478562008-10-28T17:16:00.006+00:002008-10-28T17:31:51.556+00:00The Shortlist: Part 2<p class="MsoNormal"></p><blockquote></blockquote><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><blockquote></blockquote><span style="color:red;"><blockquote></blockquote>5) Rudest hack</span></b><p></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l5 level1 lfo1; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Charles Arthur</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l5 level1 lfo1; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Gary Flood</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l5 level1 lfo1; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2008/jul/25/pressandpublishing.thetimes">Giles Coren</a></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="color:red;"><br />6) Media budget cutter<o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo2;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Graham Harman, MD of business-technology at Incisive Media<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo2;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Sly Bailey, <st1:stockticker st="on">CEO</st1:stockticker>, Trinity Mirror<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo2;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Geoff Wilmott, chief executive of Centaur<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l1 level1 lfo2;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Jerry Yang, <st1:stockticker st="on">CEO</st1:stockticker>, Yahoo</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="color:red;"><br />7) Up its own arse</span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Google's Zeitgeist conference<br />-- Queen whatsername from <st1:country-region st="on"><st1:place st="on">Jordan</st1:place></st1:country-region>? <a href="http://business.timesonline.co.uk/tol/business/industry_sectors/technology/article3952527.ece">What's all that about</a>?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>The "merger" of Computing & IT Week<br />-- Er, wasn't it a closure?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Steve Ballmer: "<st1:place st="on">Vista</st1:place> is the most popular OS we have ever produced"<br />-- Come again? What metrics you working with there, Uncle Fester?</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="color:red;"><br />8) Wank 2.0: User-generated twat</span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l4 level1 lfo4; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Ben Hammersley, deputy editor of Wired <st1:place st="on"><st1:country-region st="on">UK<br />-- Blacklisting PRs? Outrageous. Is Tim Dowling's <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2008/oct/27/1">Ben Lagen</a> really <a href="http://blog.benhammersley.com/">Ben Hammersley</a>?</st1:country-region></st1:place></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l4 level1 lfo4; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Jeff Jarvis, author of <a href="http://www.buzzmachine.com/">Buzz Machine</a> & Guardian columnist<br />-- Whining <st1:place st="on"><st1:state st="on">New York</st1:state></st1:place> professors coming over here, telling us how to run our media? No thanks mate</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l4 level1 lfo4;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Richard Bailey, lecturer, <st1:place st="on"><st1:placename st="on">Leeds</st1:placename> <st1:placename st="on">Metropolitan</st1:placename> <st1:placetype st="on">University</st1:placetype></st1:place> (PR Studies)<br />-- A platter of self-promotion garnished with<a href="http://prstudies.typepad.com/"> essential oils of arslikhan</a></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l4 level1 lfo4;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Richard Millington<br />-- Still <a href="http://www.iwanttoworkwithsethgodin.com/">at</a> it. Working with Seth Godin. <a href="http://www.feverbee.com/">FeverBee?</a> WTF?</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l3 level1 lfo5;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Brendan Cooper, Fleishman-Hillard<br />-- Cooper calls himself "Your friendly digital social media PR, ummm, thingy". He didn't come last year because he thought he'd have to pay to get in. But on his blog he's boasting about "blagging" a ticket to work on the registration desk tomorrow night. So here, to entertain you, is an extract from one of Cooper's <a href="http://brendancooper.com/2008/10/15/blog-action-day-can-the-financial-crisis-teach-us-about-poverty/">recent posts</a>:<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt"><span style="color:black;"></span></p><blockquote><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt"><span style="color:black;">This year, the focus of thousands of bloggers from around the world is on poverty.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt"><span style="color:black;">There are plenty of statistics on global poverty, and you can see many excellent posts on the <a href="http://blogactionday.org/">Blog Action Day site</a>. But what does poverty actually mean?<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt"><span style="color:black;">Poverty can take many forms. Today, for example, I’ve been intending to post on the subject all day but found I simply could not find the time to do so. This is poverty of time. . . <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:18.0pt"><span style="color:black;">Increasingly I also see poverty of relationships. . .</span></p></blockquote>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-76332384387247415002008-10-28T17:00:00.005+00:002008-10-28T17:16:05.002+00:00The Shortlist: Part 1<p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="color:red;">1) PR agency of the year</span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal">No shortlist for this one. Just one winner. You'll find out who tomorrow night.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="color:red;"><br />2) Tech hack of the year -- freelance</span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l0 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Jessica Twentyman<br />-- Murinho reversed (kind of): Britain's loss, Portugal's gain </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l0 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Danny Bradbury<br />-- You lot like Mr Bradbury. A lot. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l0 level1 lfo3; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Nick Booth<br />-- "Damn fine writer, full of great story ideas and always up for a laugh." And did we mention <a href="http://www.theinquirer.net/gb/inquirer/news/2008/05/31/nick-booth-takes-pasting">boxing</a>?<br /><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="color:red;"> 3) Tech hack of the year -- staff</span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:17.85pt;text-indent:-17.85pt;mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Chris Williams (The Register)<br />-- Excellent run of exclusives on Phorm. A bit polemical. But so what? </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:17.85pt;text-indent:-17.85pt;mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Martin Veitch (<st1:stockticker st="on">CIO)<br />-- For services to magazine editing. Worth £200 to Mike King.</st1:stockticker></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:17.85pt;text-indent:-17.85pt;mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1;tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol;mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Charles Arthur & Michael Cross -- Technology Guardian<br />-- <a href="http://www.freeourdata.org.uk/blog/index.php">Free Our Data</a>: So good, HM Govt sikked lobbyists on the authors</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="color:red;"><br />4) Biggest fuck-up<o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><o:p> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal; "><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>O2 PR calls Register readers "a bunch of techie nerds"<br /><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>-- It might be true, but <a href="http://www.theinquirer.net/gb/inquirer/news/2008/10/24/intel-apologises-mean-arm-apple">take your elbow off the redial button</a>, mate</span></o:p></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo2; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Bloomberg News: Steve Jobs is dead<br />-- Er, <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2008/aug/31/apple.stevejobs">sorry about that</a>.<br /></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo2; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>John Browett, <st1:stockticker st="on">CEO</st1:stockticker>, DSG: "We're not a retail disaster in an absolute sense"<br />-- So how do you feel about things <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2008/may/16/dsginternationalbusiness.retail">in relative terms</a>, John?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo2; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;color:black;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span><span style="color:black;">Shiny Media co-founder tells TechCrunch it's sooo hard to be a start-up<br />-- . . . and then loads of critics <a href="http://uk.techcrunch.com/2008/08/13/taking-the-shine-off-why-blog-publishing-failed-in-the-uk/">line up to tell him his sites were crap</a></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo2; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Reed Elsevier decides to sell off <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">Computer Weekly</span> amid Great Depression Mk.II<br />-- MiniMag (Ministry of Magazines) staff now so <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/newsbysector/epic/rel/3268994/Reed-Elsevier-ready-to-sweeten-vendor-financing-package-for-1bn-magazine-sale.html">totally alienated</a> that it'll be a nightmare whether or not the deal succeeds. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:18.0pt;text-indent:-18.0pt;mso-list:l2 level1 lfo2; tab-stops:list 18.0pt"><span style="font-family:Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family:Symbol;mso-bidi-font-family:Symbol;"><span style="mso-list:Ignore">·<span style="font:7.0pt "Times New Roman""> </span></span></span>Microsoft: The Gates/Sienfeld ads<br />-- Delusional creatives from half-witted Mad Men in <st1:place st="on"><st1:state st="on">Florida</st1:state></st1:place>. Do we need a link for this one? Nah. . .</p>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-60448662240561296422008-10-27T11:45:00.008+00:002008-10-27T12:05:44.393+00:00Is Martin Veitch worth £200?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSlUmYkVljASHmzvs_aVIgO4n3ZFKRcqmRaO36smUdo8yOGFcIbNn-VxrT2Cx8atwPBujoYWyDaRE8b9ZFPfJjVSoVP7FzW6xez9R2tLXt1aZsC7mPJQs6fYtrvrZocplsTc5-GHqWT8o/s1600-h/auction-hammer.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 160px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSlUmYkVljASHmzvs_aVIgO4n3ZFKRcqmRaO36smUdo8yOGFcIbNn-VxrT2Cx8atwPBujoYWyDaRE8b9ZFPfJjVSoVP7FzW6xez9R2tLXt1aZsC7mPJQs6fYtrvrZocplsTc5-GHqWT8o/s200/auction-hammer.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261799526383836578" /></a><br /><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">Fans of Flackenhacks' Adopt-A-Hack might have thought that the <a href="http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESOX:IT&item=260300290825">£86 bid</a> by Paul Doran of Switch Communications for Phil Muncaster of Vnunet was the end of the story.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">For most of last week, Muncaster seemed confirmed in his role as the nation's favourite tech hack.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">But there's a been coda, folks -- a corollary, a pendent development. . . <span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>involving runner-up Martin Veitch of <st1:stockticker st="on">CIO</st1:stockticker>, whose auction closed last Tuesday.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">In case you missed it, the <a href="http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESOX:IT&item=260300289534">best closing bid for Veitch</a> was £82 -- made by Johnson King.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">. . . But on Friday afternoon, in after-hours trading, Mike King of Johnson King dramatically upped his winning bid for Veitch to £200.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">Which means that Muncaster has now been consigned to second place in the Adopt-A-Hack sweepstakes.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal">On Friday afternoon, Veitch was displaying his sharp elbows on Google Mail. The world's leading Geordie tech hack had this to say: "Just so long as it's made very clear that I won the race, albeit after the race had officially finished."</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;"><o:p>Uh, our tickers can hardly stand it. Here's where we're at right now:</o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><blockquote><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;"><o:p>1) Martin Veitch (<st1:stockticker st="on">CIO</st1:stockticker>) -- £200.00</o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">2) Phil Muncaster (Vnunet) -- £86.00<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">3) Mark Dye (Freelance) -- £36.00<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">4) Bryan Glick (Computing) -- £30.99 <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">5) Mark Samuels (<st1:stockticker st="on">CIO</st1:stockticker> Connect) -- £26.00<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">6)= Michael Dempsey -- £19.99<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">7)= Andy McCue -- £19.99<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">8)= Rupert Goodwins -- £19.99</span></span></p></blockquote> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">And if your pulse isn't already racing, how about this?</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">We've just added auctions for <a href="http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESELX:IT&item=260306651790">Gordon Kelly</a> (news editor at Trusted Reviews) and <a href="http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESELX:IT&item=260306654858">Tim Phillips</a> (the freelance who has written Computing's Backbytes column for the past 12 years).</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color:black;">You've got 48 hours to bid on either (or both) of these blokes. Plus, of course, Jeremy Kirk, Rob Kerr, Eric Doyle and David Meyer, who will continue to twist in the wind for another day or so.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal">As always: low start, no reserve and 50% of whatever we raise goes to Byte Night. (Although in the case of Mike King's generous bid, we'll obviously be revising that proviso. . . )</p><p class="MsoNormal">. . . Get clicking!<br /></p>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-26507420736744137122008-10-23T12:54:00.004+01:002008-10-23T13:15:12.026+01:00250 guests and counting. We don't want to be alarmist, but. . .. . . We are conceivably getting close to a sell-out.<div><br /></div><div>Of course, event organisers say this all of the time. But on Monday next week, we'll have to forecast final numbers for the purposes of booze economics. And food.</div><div><br /></div><div>So it's possible -- just possible -- that we might have problems dealing with a last minute tsunami of bookings. Something akin to that seems to be building up right now. . .</div><div><br /></div><div>Just thought we'd mention it.</div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">Footnote: </span>Some of you -- typically hacks for some odd reason -- have been asking us whether The Flackenhacks has been credit crunched. Will we get the numbers to fill our venue? Might we fall victim to Dick Fuld's tsunami of collateralised debt obligations?</div><div><br /></div><div>The answer comes in two parts. A deep silence did descend on our box office on, or around, 1st October. For the best part of two weeks, we all waited to see whether the sky would fall (along with the markets). And no-one booked anything much.</div><div><br /></div><div>Then Gordon Brown announced his bank bail-out. And hey presto, the bookings resumed. If we get a moment before next Wednesday, we'll post up a spreadsheet containing the numbers. They're eerie. Probably a bit like UK GDP numbers, we reckon.</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway, bottom line: things are looking OK. We're expecting an increase in numbers over last year (not sure how much yet..). And despite the odd blip in terms of sponsorship, that side of things came good in the end, too. (Thanks to our sponsors BTW including those who have pitched up late in the day -- your help is massively appreciated...)</div><div><br /></div><div>It's shaping up to be a great, great, night...</div><div><br /></div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-60864576095168550532008-10-22T12:28:00.003+01:002008-10-22T12:51:34.158+01:00C'mon you lot<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgggrKMkrJHdBBzDwnuAna-X_GSaTv5G7f3BVsjfWRjRC3YWGzSPVMGpgLHaJM34AN4-JNG-VIs4XhnALZbMkC8yVar0Kp0O6JiLVBUF0Drnud5hIn4ckp5vwbi79534zChk_q0dPWBRXA/s1600-h/logo_byte_night.gif"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgggrKMkrJHdBBzDwnuAna-X_GSaTv5G7f3BVsjfWRjRC3YWGzSPVMGpgLHaJM34AN4-JNG-VIs4XhnALZbMkC8yVar0Kp0O6JiLVBUF0Drnud5hIn4ckp5vwbi79534zChk_q0dPWBRXA/s200/logo_byte_night.gif" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5259943352715100514" /></a>Boys and girls, we need to talk.<div><br /></div><div>We've now got <a href="http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/flackenhacks">nine hacks up for auction</a>. Some of these auctions will be ending in a day or so. But only two of the auctions have bids.</div><div><br /></div><div>At this point, we're going to get serious with you for a minute. You bloody well know that <a href="http://www.bytenight.org.uk/">Byte Night</a> is a worthy cause. And it's not as if we're asking for thousands -- or even hundreds -- of pounds. You don't even need a pressing business case to make a bid. (Well, we hope not. . . )</div><div><br /></div><div>Yep, we know about of that recession malarky. We bored sick of it already.</div><div><br /></div><div>We've had more than a few conversations with cash-strapped MDs in recent weeks who reckon they can't afford to send any staff to The Flackenhacks. (You want names? Ah, modesty forbids. Thus far, anyway. But if enough of the buggers snaffle up for themselves the small number of complimentary tickets being offered by our sponsors, we might change our tune. . .)</div><div><br /></div><div>But really. . . can your corporate coffers not accomodate just a few more trifling bids on EBay?</div><div><br /></div><div>Ferchrissakes, the folks at Spark, Johnson King, Escherman and Switch Communications have made some sterling bids so far. Plus some others we can't quite identify from their EBay handles. Thanks to them.</div><div><br /></div><div>As for the rest of you: you really don't have to dig deep. Shallow will do. We're talking small beer that could mean a lot to someone less fortunate than yourself.</div><div><br /></div><div>And we don't mean journalists, either.</div><div><br /></div><div>C'mon, let's do this thing. . . </div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-75425136420043752482008-10-21T23:01:00.005+01:002008-10-21T23:23:30.588+01:00Rob Kerr: Tight prop head demands to be served<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVEZayXgapwNAfmPoBU7R4C9BaXDe7u87TSEXjR_qC7QaslO9UBMk5FVKTaJWE31eg34_MoXumc0HY5tXPY2o0FUY19lo3HEgyesn1BeQfbUokavywHsWjyx8JQd9oepr1CTfw6TED02g/s1600-h/rob+kerr"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVEZayXgapwNAfmPoBU7R4C9BaXDe7u87TSEXjR_qC7QaslO9UBMk5FVKTaJWE31eg34_MoXumc0HY5tXPY2o0FUY19lo3HEgyesn1BeQfbUokavywHsWjyx8JQd9oepr1CTfw6TED02g/s200/rob+kerr" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5259734642046151922" /></a><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family:arial;font-size:13px;"><div>That Rob Kerr's been on again. He really does want to be auctioned off.</div><div><br /></div><div>This all started a week ago, when The Man Himself got in touch and suggested we auction a ticket for him <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">plus</span> the added attraction of "a (separate) night or day of heavy drinking" in his company.</div><div><br /></div><div>The latter, Kerr suggested, might result in his host experiencing "a spell in hospital" and a "lengthy period of recovery in The Priory".</div><div><br /></div><div>With this missive, Kerr sent us the pic appended to this post, plus several more.</div><div><br /></div><div>Now, seven days later, he sounds a bit irritated by our inaction. And pissed off by our jibe that we'd need to raise £300 in an auction to cover the cost of his pie-and-booze consumption at The Flackenhacks.</div><div><br /></div><div>Here's what he's saying now:</div><blockquote>It's probably better to have me on your side than not :)<br /><br />Do you really want to upset and turn away the voice of Brian Blessed?</blockquote>For good measure, Kerr adds that his physique is the way it is because he plays tight head prop for London Scottish.</span><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family:arial;font-size:13px;">. . . We know when we're beat. Kerr is going upon EBay tomorrow -- with a reserve price of £250 on his head. Don't say you weren't warned.</span></div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-67633133055868752042008-10-21T15:14:00.005+01:002008-10-21T16:13:18.268+01:00Hustle, hustle: Coming down to the wirePaul Doran of <a href="http://www.switchcoms.com/">Switch Communications</a> has become a <a href="http://flackenhacks.blogspot.com/2008/10/monkey-behind-bar.html">Friend Of Theo</a>. Thanks mate.<div><br /></div><div>And we've recruited three fine people to look after registrations on the night: Alex Pullin (of Rocket Communications), Laura Lynne (of Trimedia) and Kim Hollingdale (of NEC). Thanks for the offer of assistance, y'all.</div><div><br /></div><div>Space for one more, we reckon. Any takers? (No, not you Whitehurst. Didn't the careers advisory service mention that you lack the social skills for a front of house job?)</div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">Update on EBay auctions:</span> Charles Arthur of The Guardian <a href="https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=810367760318045583&postID=6710913354292683876">can't make it</a>. Yeah, sad, we're crying into our soup. . . But check this out: Phil Muncaster finished on £86.00 and Martin Veitch crawled across the line at £82.00.</div><div><br /></div><div>Rupert Goodwins (what the hell is going on here?) finished on £19.99. Sheesh. Have you lot got no taste?</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway: <a href="http://myworld.ebay.co.uk/flackenhacks">currently up for sale</a> -- Andy McCue, Mark Samuels, Bryan Glick, Michael Dempsey, Mark Dye and Jeremy Kirk. (We called Bryan this morning. He's getting nervous that bidding hasn't got off the ground. Can anyone help?)</div><div><br /></div><div>We're hoping to pop a few more maestros up for sale shortly. Oh, yes, and then there's the question of what to do with Eric Doyle and Rob Kerr.</div><div><br /></div><div>To be honest, we're scared that Doyle and Kerr will clean us out of pies. And when we tried to compute the alcohol liability, our calculator flashed up: ERROR.<br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Will anyone bid the £300+ we'll require to break even on their tickets? Brother and sisters, all creative suggestions welcomed.</div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-50169373737140862212008-10-21T10:07:00.004+01:002008-10-21T10:18:43.310+01:00Help wanted/free tickets: Front desk at The FlackenhacksWe're holding four free tickets for people who would like to help us out with the registration desk at The Flackenhacks next Wednesday 29 October.<div><br /></div><div>The job involves ticking guests' names off on our list as they come through the entrance and applying name badges to their persons. Should take an hour, perhaps a bit longer . . . after that, you'll be a partygoer like everyone else.</div><div><br /></div><div>If you fancy helping out, drop us a line. . . The first four people to send emails get the tickets. . .</div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-60355067023953084732008-10-20T11:00:00.007+01:002008-10-21T10:19:40.518+01:00A monkey behind the bar?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_z0kfmmMsdvDOgLvTqepnFH6oEMbMKM4jiBLAhNoNAeiR84VkQXemh2rgbchjyqHXfZvBgBes2WobQb0Zi8PGrrPAVK1RG8GjkNt2V4oNI0wkkyYmtV__VzfA2e6UDEdxxHn8yuLqTWo/s1600-h/bad-monkey.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_z0kfmmMsdvDOgLvTqepnFH6oEMbMKM4jiBLAhNoNAeiR84VkQXemh2rgbchjyqHXfZvBgBes2WobQb0Zi8PGrrPAVK1RG8GjkNt2V4oNI0wkkyYmtV__VzfA2e6UDEdxxHn8yuLqTWo/s200/bad-monkey.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5259534365383295842" /></a><br />Last week was a bit mixed, to be honest. Good news all the way, and then -- bam! Towards the end of the week, we had a prospective sponsor pull out.<div><br /></div><div>No names, no pack drill. Shit happens. It's not life-threatening. But we were left with a small but perfectly-formed gap in the Flackenhacks budget.</div><div><br /></div><div>In response, we're opening up a new sponsorship category for those of you who feel a warm glow of goodwill towards The Flackenhacks and might be able to help us out a bit.</div><div><br /></div><div>We're not talking big bucks sponsorship. No: we're talking Friends of Theo: A Monkey Behind The Bar.</div><div><br /></div><div>In other words, we're looking for a few hundred quid (up to a monkey...) from you to help defray our beverage bill. In return, you'll get some branding on the night -- and the certain knowledge that you helped us to stage an evening to remember.</div><div><br /></div><div>Monkey No.1 is Dan Ilett of Greenbang. The drinks are on him between 7.30pm and 8pm. . . <br /></div><div><br /></div><div>If you'd like to join Dan, just drop us a line...</div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-67109133542926838762008-10-17T17:33:00.005+01:002008-10-17T17:54:46.615+01:00Martin Veitch: "I'm stomping over Muncaster and everyone else"The cream rises to the top, writes Martin Veitch.<div><br /></div><div>We don't know about that. But we are curious about what the editor-in-chief of CIO is promising his bidders in addition to his presence at The Flackenhacks.</div><div><br /></div><div>Bidding for Veitch's hand has now reached a startling £82. Phil Muncaster is on £56.00.</div><div><br /></div><div>At IDG, Veitch has taken to emailing his colleagues proclaiming his popularity. Unseemly, we'd say.</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway: one of Veitch's colleagues, IDG Newswire's Jeremy Kirk, emails us to ask what it takes to get on <a href="http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/flackenhacks">our auction list</a>.</div><div><br /></div><div>Nothing, really. Apart from a copper-bottomed temperament. That'll come in handy if no-one bids for you.</div><div><br /></div><div>Apropos of which. . . Rupert Goodwins: blimey. What can we say? Sill stuck on £19.99. (Can this be right? The man is an editor, a radio enthusiast and he's fine company too. . . We're frankly mystified.)</div><div><br /></div><div>Still, at least Goodwins will be coming to the party, courtesy of a face-saving bid from Andy Smith, who has been Twittering away contently about his opportunism this afternoon. Careful, mate, you might be outflanked by a couple of lurkers who are watching Goodwins' spot price.</div><div><br /></div><div>What can we say about Messrs McCue, Dempsey, Glick and Dye? No bids for them at present. Still, it's early doors, admittedly...</div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-38618296165819674692008-10-17T09:51:00.002+01:002008-10-17T09:54:31.774+01:00Food at The Flackenhacks. . .<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKuR_q0Zlkuxv1Vy9fw3Ftj33JQpKNxb6smp5egqJfJX6Aqqx_DEI9z9eCK0CBNjevFMlbpacVlp97-38d2unZfCA5NEkM5RdD5MPalzHVVyGFjh2dbOgtE4ZiN0OTghQdIo5NWIx-j0g/s1600-h/pie+and+mash+open+box.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKuR_q0Zlkuxv1Vy9fw3Ftj33JQpKNxb6smp5egqJfJX6Aqqx_DEI9z9eCK0CBNjevFMlbpacVlp97-38d2unZfCA5NEkM5RdD5MPalzHVVyGFjh2dbOgtE4ZiN0OTghQdIo5NWIx-j0g/s200/pie+and+mash+open+box.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5258043237769680338" /></a><br /><p class="MsoNormal">We've upped the ante on food this year.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Pieminister, a Bristol-based start-up, is going to furnish us with its Pie Pod. This lovely little vehicle will be dispensing pies, mash and gravy at The Flackenhacks. We'll be laying out some big long tables so that you can all sit down, eat and chat.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">You can forget about Pukka Pies and the like. Pieminister will be serving up some top-of-the-range stuff, as follows:</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The Matador Pie -- Beef, chorizo, olives butter beans and sherry</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The Chicken of <st1:place st="on"><st1:country-region st="on">Aragon</st1:country-region></st1:place> Pie -- Free range chicken, tarragon, smoky bacon, vermouth</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The Heidi Pie (Vegetarian): Goats cheese, sweet potato, spinach, roasted garlic.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Plus mashed potato and gravy.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The small print contains all of the good stuff you'd want to see: full traceability of all food, free range meat and eggs, use of local suppliers etc etc.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Nice people, good food: we reckon you like 'em both…</p>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-6907899714223732892008-10-16T23:10:00.003+01:002008-10-16T23:34:43.189+01:00A word about your compere. . .<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgukU9vlG0mBfKv8GZWx7m7cc1c2FXgSEg703QSCOEw9uBN8Gu__n0p-42VWeaH23Y_IAqlclYCGu8lLRcDzPndpES_-3NJKGhqDhsGiE9n2F4-NRyol97lV24qIIhRsgVQ548paoWBxu4/s1600-h/Paul+With+Cup.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgukU9vlG0mBfKv8GZWx7m7cc1c2FXgSEg703QSCOEw9uBN8Gu__n0p-42VWeaH23Y_IAqlclYCGu8lLRcDzPndpES_-3NJKGhqDhsGiE9n2F4-NRyol97lV24qIIhRsgVQ548paoWBxu4/s200/Paul+With+Cup.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5257882838404106850" /></a><br /><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;"><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;"><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the shockingly good Paul Wooding, the only man in tech PR brave enough to tread the boards at The Flackenhacks. . .</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">Last year, Paul did the honours onstage. He was good, really good. This year, he says he is going to properly let himself off the leash. We're already receiving broad hints about gags involving cancer-stricken celebrities.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">Anyway, here's the boy's own Miss World-style biography. . .</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"><br /></span></div><div></div><blockquote><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">What did you do before PR?</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">I spent my formative years giving Sonic The Hedgehog a hard time in print.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">Why did you become a P</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">R?</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">I like to tell everyone it was the lure of working for a client in the pneumatics’ industry, but if I'm honest it was the lucre.<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">Tell us about your hobbies. . .</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"> </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">I have a penchant for Styrofoam. I sometimes roam the streets of East Sheen making owl noises.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">Your greatest wish?</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">To climb Primrose Hill.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">Ideal job?</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">Selling vegetable stew at music festivals.</span></div></blockquote><div></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;">In these straightened times, we reckon that publication of this could add a frisson to Paul's next performance review. As in:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: georgia;"> Paul, we'd like to discuss your stew concept. When do you think you can start?. . . </span></span><br /></span></span>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-50465711991916670822008-10-16T22:58:00.003+01:002008-10-16T23:50:40.246+01:00EBay auctions: More to come<div>Mark Samuels (ex-<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">Computing</span>, now editor of <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">CIO Connect</span>) is <a href="http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Flackenhacks-Adopt-A-Hack-Mark-Samuels-CIO-Connect_W0QQitemZ260301369593QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item260301369593&_trkparms=72:1301|39:1|66:2|65:12|240:1318&_trksid=p3911.c0.m14">up and running</a> on EBay.<br /></div><div><br /></div>Coming up very soon (ie: tomorrow): Mark Dye, Dan Ilett, Andy McCue, Michael Dempsey and. . . oooooohh yes, Rob Kerr.<div><br /></div><div>Mike Magee tells us that he can't make it on the 29th. He's in Hyderabad. Or somesuch. Sorry, Mr Palmer: you'll have to find someone else to spend your lucre on.</div><div><br /></div><div>Separately (honest). . . we're sworn to secrecy about the hack who gave us permission to auction him off, complete with an image of himelf naked. Oddly, his bosses objected, and we had to pull the auction.</div><div><br /></div><div>Got requests? Stick 'em in the comments. Thanks y'all...</div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-14106507533019518112008-10-15T22:05:00.003+01:002008-10-15T22:13:54.429+01:00Flackenhack Award Categories: Part 3<p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">Thanks for the nominations we've received so far. Some look very promising. . . Funny even.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" font-style: italic;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">A further package of awards categories has appeared beneath the gooseberry bush. . . Any suggestion that the judges have already arrived at a decision about the category labeled "most hyped new business of the year" is scurrillous and will attract the attention of our most learned friends. You have been warned.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" font-weight: bold;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span>Loyalty to dead media formats</span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span style="font-size:100%;">Stop crying…you'll make all the pages go soggy. This one's the opposite to the muppet above. Can't quite bring himself to believe that the printing press's day has come; that paper's about as fashionable as a career in investment banking. Get over it grandpa. We all have.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span>Most hyped new business of the year </span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span>PR Weak called it '<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN">the most sought-after retainer of the year' (arguably). Was it bollocks.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span>Rebrand of the year</span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span style="font-size:100%;">Company in trouble? Call it something else…nobody will ever guess. Product not selling? Give it a new name…that'll boost sales. Do they think we're stupid? No, they don't think it. The research said so. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span>Bandwagon jump of the year</span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span style="font-size:100%;">Green washing? Crunch washing? Shaky Olympic tie-ins? There's always unashamed hype-surfing happening in the PR industry. Who's had the most blatant crack at it in 2008?</span></p>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-45808722959848585742008-10-15T15:48:00.004+01:002008-10-15T15:55:22.958+01:00EBay update -- Muncaster takes the lead: ignition trouble for Spark?<p class="MsoNormal">Oooh-errr missus.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Signs of life on Ebay, where we are auctioning off the right to invite hacks to The Flackenhacks. (Low start, 50% goes to Byte Night -- you know the score.)</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Just a moment ago, Phil Muncaster of Vnunet/Computing sent us a missive bemoaning the fact that someone has bid more for Rupert Goodwins than for him. </p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><blockquote>What outrage is this?? I am officially less popular than Goodwins?<br />That hurts man, that hurts....</blockquote><p></p><p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">It must have taken a while to get to us. As we write, the <a href="http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESELX:IT&item=260300290825">bidding for Muncaster's hand</a> has risen to £31.00. That's courtesy of a lively tussle between Spark Communications and "doran321".</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Flackenhacks-Adopt-A-Hack-Rupert-Goodwins-ZDNet_W0QQitemZ260300264491QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item260300264491&_trkparms=72:1301|39:1|66:2|65:12|240:1318&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14">Goodwins</a>? He's languishing at the start price of £19.99. But at least someone has bid for him. Andrew Smith of Escherman has nipped in with an offer.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Martin Veitch of <st1:stockticker st="on">CIO</st1:stockticker> magazine has <a href="http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Flackenhacks-Adopt-A-Hack-Martin-Veitch-CIO_W0QQitemZ260300289534QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item260300289534&_trkparms=72:1301|39:1|66:2|65:12|240:1318&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14">gotten off the blocks, too</a>. Bidding for the right to squire the suave northerner is led by "leoking1981".</p> <p class="MsoNormal">It looks like this is working. We'll get another batch of hacks up there sharpish. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Quick thought: if anyone is on the phone to Charles Arthur this afternoon, can you remember to ask him if he'd like to sold off too? We're looking forrard to that 'un.</p>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-56154227188115613132008-10-14T13:08:00.002+01:002008-10-14T13:15:03.513+01:00For sale on EBay: Three hacks, lightly worn, in excellent conditionThe Flackenhacks' Adopt-A-Hack Troubled Assets Recovery Programme (TM) has gotten under way at EBay.<div><br /></div><div>Seven day auctions, no reserve, a low starting price -- and 50% of everything goes to Byte Night.</div><div><br /></div><div>Thus far, you may bid for tickets on behalf of. . .</div><div><ul><li>Rupert Goodwins, editor of ZDNet</li><li>Martin Veitch, editor of CIO magazine</li><li>Phil Muncaster, senior/chief reporter at Vnunet</li></ul><div><a href="http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/flackenhacks">Here</a>.</div><div><br /></div><div>(We'll see how these ones go. If you like the idea and we get some bids, we'll put some more up, sharpish. Cheers!)</div></div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-810367760318045583.post-61728647433354248242008-10-14T07:50:00.003+01:002008-10-14T07:56:39.335+01:00Flackenhack Award Categories: Part 2<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Two weeks to go until The Flackenhacks 2008. . . </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">And here are more categories dredged up from beneath the gooseberry bush in the Flackenhacks' back yard. . . Let us have your nominations, please: y</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 20px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">ou can do so in the form of a comment, anonymously if you prefer. Elsewise, feel free to drop us an email at theflackenhacks [AT] gmail.com.</span></span></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-style: italic; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span><div><p><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">Rude hack</span></span></b><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">Charles Arthur. Nuff said. No? There are more..?</span></span></p><p><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">Media budget cutter </span></span></b><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">Whoops! There go my advertisers. When the ads dry up, these fellas unsheath their swords. Who wields the most ferocious weapon in media?</span></span></p><p><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">Up its own arse</span></span></b><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">They've drunk the Kool-Aid, they've eaten the dog food. How come we're the ones who are yacking up? We say, don't ever believe your own PR. They say, "but we're the world's leading…"</span></span></p><p><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">Pointless press release </span></span></b><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">We're just going to sift through PR Newswire for a couple of days. Sure we'll dig something up. But if you've got a particularly good example (anonymity guaranteed) then let us know.</span></span></p><p><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><b><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">Wank 2.0: User-generated twat </span></span></b><span lang="EN-US"></span></p> <p><span style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:100%;"><span lang="EN-US" style=" ;font-family:Calibri;font-size:12pt;">Yes, yes, we know, everything's going digital. Wiki, blog, 2.0, 3.0, social, Facebook, crowdsourcing, viral video, widget, feed, comment. We buy it, OK? But Christ, some people just will not stop banging on about it. Who's the one you just wish would shut up. Just for a bit, eh?</span></span><span lang="EN-US"></span></p></div></div>The Flackenhackshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10991337102461291775noreply@blogger.com0